Anal Sex (Gasp!): A Hands-On Manual
by sweetsubsarahh

Anal Sex.

Also known as Sodomy, Greek love, Buggery, Booty sex, Backdoor loving, Dicking the derriere, Banging the bung hole, Reaming the rump, Probing the poop chute, Touring the Hershey highway, Raping the rectum, Packing the fudge, Traveling the old dirt road, Tossing the salad and plain old Butt fishing.

Why the Fascination with Anal Stimulation?

Why Not?

The many nerve endings in the anus can give intense orgasms to the recipient while the cock provider enjoys a clutching, tightened orifice. The very idea of anal sex is arousing to many, and this form of erotic pleasure is expanding the sexual repertoire of a growing number of lovers. Still considered somewhat socially taboo, it can add excitement, spice, and a feeling of naughty or nasty play.

Some couples reserve it for special occasions or to culminate the evening's sexual activities, others offer it to their lover as a gift. Anal play is often part of successful Dominant/submissive relationships.

Certain women, however, are simply not interested in this type of sex. Some because they are just not anally erotic, others because an ignorant or insensitive lover bungled their first time attempt. Additionally, a few people do have negative misconceptions about the act, perhaps relating to an overly restrictive upbringing. Since you are reading this story, you've obviously been able to overcome anything such as that!

This How-To story is directed towards the male reader interested in exploring new territory with his female partner. Being a dedicated lover of anal sex I hope to offer some helpful thoughts and suggestions.

Communication

It can be very difficult to introduce the idea of anal sex into an established relationship. Be honest; be completely direct about your feelings. Though some call it the ultimate test of trust and love, I don't feel women should be compelled to do this as a "favor" for their partner. Ladies, if you are not committed to the idea, don't pursue it. This can be an intense sexual experience but it is meant to be shared.

Of course, men should NEVER force this (for her first time) upon your partner during sex. No one believes that you can "accidentally" miss her pussy and impale her ass. Nope. That just doesn't happen. The sudden pain will certainly ruin the chance of future anal play with her and the definite loss of trust could possibly destroy your relationship.

Sanitation

Yes.

It is necessary that we begin matters by talking about, um, poop. Yeats wrote poetically of "love pitching his mansion in the place of excrement", and unfortunately, that is indeed appropriate to our situation.

Anal sex can be relatively clean. Recipients should be in good digestive health, diet is very important, obviously, and have had a bowel movement recently.

Many people, including myself, choose to internally cleanse themselves before engaging in this activity. I refer of course to an "enema", and taken several hours before sex should help prevent any surprises. Some couples manage to incorporate this into their lovemaking.

There are people who don't worry at all about that aspect of anal play. Some folks enjoy getting a bit "messy", others have sex in the shower to wash away any unexpected unpleasantness. Just select whatever pleases you both.

A very important element to remember during anal sex is the possibility of cross-contamination. Never go from the anus to the vagina, whether with fingers, toys, or penis. You run the risk of transferring fecal bacteria. Of course, starting in the pussy and winding up in the ass is just fine! (Actually, it's terrific!)

Anatomical Configuration

She's clean or she's comfortable with her situation.

What now?

Now is not the time you shove into her ass and start banging away.

Ouch.

Anal sex should not hurt. Unless you are hung like Secretariat or she has specific physical issues, if this activity causes her pain, the two of you are doing something wrong.

Both of you should know your own bodies. She should certainly be aware of her limitations; what feels good, what does not, and how much length and girth she thinks she can tolerate in her tightest hole.

Gentlemen, you should also come to terms with yourselves. Explore your own asses. (I'm smiling as I type this, thinking of your expressions). Before you touch hers, it is important that you know the sensations and the sensitivities of yours. It will make you a much better anal lover, and you just might find something else sexually that you enjoy!

Anatomically speaking, there are two separate sphincter muscles surrounding the anal opening. Count 'em, two! They are different kinds of muscles, and they function independently of each other.

The first you will encounter is called the outer sphincter. It is a voluntary muscle and can be easily controlled by the recipient (take a moment and clench your ass - you can tell). That muscle is rarely the problem during anal sex.

The internal sphincter, however, is a bit different. It is an involuntary muscle (like your heart pumping) and fear or anxiety will cause it to tense and to close tightly. With practice and relaxation techniques it is possible to learn some control, but for the novice, this explains the occasional pain or discomfort.

Relaxation

Vital. Essential.

The two of you need privacy. You don't want interruptions. Make sure you have several hours to play; there should be no rushing through this event.

Encourage your lady to take long hot bath and perhaps have a glass or two of wine (or her beverage of choice). Neither one of you should drink to excess. Too much alcohol tends to dull nerves and sensitivities, and you really need all your faculties as you attempt this new skill.

Preparation

Patience.

You should spend lots of time hugging and snuggling before the main event. Take your time, ensure her eager arousal. Play. Be silly, nasty, whatever your turn-on. Go for naughty movies, stories, chat, erotic games . . .

Help your partner get ready by doing all those things you know she loves. Back rubs are nice, as are massages with lots of warm scented oil trickling down into her body crevices. Toy with her nipples, caress her body, nuzzle her neck, lick every little part. Some suggest you bring your partner to orgasm first before even attempting anal.

Oral Stimulation

Ah, yes. Heavenly.

For many people, analingus, or rimming, is acutely erotic. Imagine her on all fours as you come up behind her, spreading her ass cheeks with your hands as you begin to lick. Start with her clit perhaps, licking, nibbling, blowing cool air. Next pleasure her wet pussy, making her writhe, and then finally make your way back, swirling your tongue around her ass.

Pay attention to all those exposed areas of her inner flesh, flicking with your tongue, taking little nibbles. Progress to gentle tonguing and then deeply probing her anus, and eventually use a combination of all your oral skills.

Done properly, this technique is mind-blowing. If you're uncertain, just keep practicing. She will certainly appreciate your efforts!

Lubrication

If your lady has been enjoying all of these things up until now, she probably has copious amounts of wetness, at least in her pussy. The rectum, however, is not the vagina. The ass needs specific lubricant, and the more the merrier.

The type of lubricant is very important. Water-soluble lubes work well with condoms and are soothing and slippery. They usually require repeated applications during sex. Popular brands include Astroglide, KY-Jelly, and ID (which is available in a pump dispenser).

Oil-based lubes, such as petroleum jelly, quickly cause condoms to degrade. They also coat the inside of the rectum, creating a wonderful breeding ground for germs.

The rectum does contain bacteria and thus a very slight possibility of urinary tract infection for you, though she generally stands at greater risk. Condoms can help with that situation and many choose them every time with anal sex, though the majority of people report no problems going bare. Also, urinating after sex (both of you) is a good way to help prevent infection.

Additionally, you should always AVOID any anal sex lubricant that has a desensitizing agent. Pain is a body's way of announcing that something is wrong. Without that awareness, if her parts are numb, you could accidentally harm her and neither of you would realize it until much later.

Unlike most porn flicks, pussy juices and spit are usually not enough to ease your path, certainly not if this is a first time event for her. Use lube. Lots of it. Coat your cock, her anus, and make sure enough is deposited inside her ass.

Digital Penetration

Now we're getting somewhere.

Men! Clean and trim your fingernails. Or else!

You could easily injure her sensitive tissues if you are not smoothly groomed.

Some people wish to use latex gloves, especially if this is a new experience for both. Others prefer bare. Either way, always begin with well-lubed fingers.

Use gentle touches to start. Circle around her anus, tease, toy, and lightly push in the center. Make certain you ARE in the center. Looks can be deceiving, so before you probe, be positive of your location.

Penetrate ever so slightly, and then back away. Do this again, and again, and again, and again. Hopefully your partner's sighs will encourage further naughty activities.

As you play you'll feel her anus gradually relax; now is the time to slowly slide your finger in deeply. This can be startling for her, sometimes giving her the false sensation of needing to go to the bathroom. That will go away in time. Withdraw gently, add more lube, and go back for more.

Simulation

Toys.

Yeah!

After your fingers and before your cock, toys are a terrific way to help prepare her passage.

She should probably purchase her own equipment; she will know her own tastes. Generally the soft jelly toys are the most comfortable for beginners. Start small and slender, and gradually, over a period of weeks or months, work up in size. For additional cleanliness, many people use condoms on their toys.

Anal plugs can be quite helpful; they can be worn for a longer period of time, causing tense muscles to relax. Additionally, they usually have a wide base to prevent the toy from sliding all the way inside the rectum. Be mindful of sizes; they do seem to go from small to huge with no middle ground.

Orientation

Positions. Placement.

There are many ways to approach this but a safe idea would be traditional comfort and reliability. A few old standards for the first time include:

Ride 'em Cowgirl

You lay on your back while she straddles your groin, facing you. In this way she can guide the speed, depth, and angle of penetration. She should be careful not to tighten her pelvic muscles as she sits astride. This gives you the perfect opportunity to pleasure her breasts, her clitoris, and to watch her face as she climaxes.

Naughty Missionary

She lays on her back with a pillow under her rear. Her legs are spread and her knees are up high. As before, you can pleasure her breasts, her clitoris, and watch her climax.

Running with Scissors

In the typical scissors position, she lies on her side with her legs spread and you lay behind her, entering her from the rear. It is a perfect position for your hands to stimulate her breasts and your mouth to nuzzle her neck.

Woof!

My favorite position is rear-entry or doggie style. She is on her hands and knees, head down (perhaps on a pillow) ass up high, while you slide your body behind. You bring your lubed cock up between her cheeks, grasping her hips in your big hands, slowly pushing your thick cock into her tight ass while she gasps and squirms and. . .

Um, where was I?

Penetration

Ah, yes.

Again, I caution extreme patience.

Let her guide the action now; follow her direction. You should remain stationary and allow her to push her ass onto your cock. Do not attempt to force passage. She knows her own body and by now you probably have a huge erection (which does tend to limit the blood supply to the thinking portion of your brain).

Once the head of your cock is inserted cease all forward momentum. Allow her time to adjust to the new and overwhelming sensations. Caress, nibble and lick parts within your reach; as you sense her relaxation, gently slide inwards. Continue until you're in all the way, and then stop once again until her body adapts. After complete insertion, you should pleasure her clit, or have her touch herself at your command. Erotically intense.

At this time, your cock feels hard, hot and throbbing inside her. Senses are acute, energy is high, and you are almost there. (Personally, when he is in my ass and my favorite vibrator is buzzing on my clit I am positively incoherent).

Elation

You're in her clutching ass up to your 'nads and her sighs speak only of lust. All systems are go; it's time to get things moving.

Begin a slow in and out stroke pattern, stopping for additional lubrication if necessary. Continue at a leisurely tempo and soon you'll be able to easily slide inside her loosening orifice. Follow your partner's lead. When she gasps and moans and pushes herself back against your body, smile and increase your thrusting speed and strength.

For women, being anally impaled by a thick cock combined with clitoral stimulation is intense. She may orgasm before you; watching your lover climax is wonderfully exciting and should add to your overall enjoyment. Additionally, her anus may be so tight you may not be able to last as long as is typical for you. But exploding in her snug ass will be an incredibly passionate experience.

Exhilaration

Relax together, feel proud. You've accomplished something tremendous!

She may need recuperative time so you should wait a few days before attempting this again. Eventually that may not be necessary, and if she is indeed anally erotic, she won't even need all the relaxation and preparation. You'll discover that fact one wonderful night when she begs you to fish her ass.

Final Destination

So, class, what have we learned? Perhaps that between loving couples almost anything is possible. Enjoy discovering new things you both enjoy, and with additional practice (don't forget to drill, drill, drill . . .) your skills will improve and your sexual repertoire will expand. With love, time, effort, communication (and a bit of courage) you can meet your desires head-on.

And in the end, it's a helluva lot more fun than Masturbation.

But that's another story.

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